Forgiveness requires recognition that a wrong has been committed. Read Ephesians 4:31-32. One of my summer jobs included cleaning restrooms, the kitchen, the dining room, and the grounds. My trainer said the most important aspect of cleaning was the ability to see. “If you see a mess, clean it up.” The same goes for forgiveness. Most of the time, we know when someone has hurt us, but not always. Many people hurt us while manipulating our thinking that they are helping us, or by minimizing the pain they are causing us. We have to see their actions as hurtful before we can begin to process them. We also need to distinguish the small stuff that we need to let go from the big stuff that we need to confront. There is a difference between someone who cuts in line and the person who punches you in the face. One of life’s lessons is, “Don’t sweat the small stuff.” So someone has hurt us in a big way. We are aware that we have been wronged, and we feel the hurt. We feel angry, and we relive the hurt over and over. What do we do? One option is to seek revenge by hurting the person in return. That is not the biblical option, but it is an option that we can choose. A biblical option would be justice. If a law has been broken, we can bring in the court system to hold the person accountable. Revenge and justice don’t remove the hurt. Forgiveness is the path to healing. The Apostle Paul encourages us to “get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.” We normally apply this verse in a general way, but let’s be specific. If someone has hurt you, we may be tempted to harbor bitterness, rage, and anger. There is an alternative. “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Forgiveness isn’t about minimizing the hurt you feel. Forgiveness is the way you deal with your hurt as opposed to holding on to bitterness.

Come, Holy Spirit, transform us into the likeness of Jesus. Transform our bitterness into forgiveness. Transform our anger into compassion. Transform our rage into positive steps toward healing and wholeness. Amen.